Getting into the perfect relationship is hard enough but staying in a relationship is difficult to maintain. Relationships change and morph into something that may be completely different than when it first began. Your time with your partner is no longer peachy keen, and life seems to drag. However, there are always ways to enhance and make your relationship that much more exciting. According to Lisa Firestone, a clinical psychologist and Director of Research and Education for the Glendon association, staying in love means taking the hard road and being able to differentiate from past negative influences. Allowing yourself to continue to be more and more intimate with your partner and allowing your subconscious to be vulnerable. Here are some ways you can really create a long-lasting relationship that can pick up steam whenever you need it too.
Create times of laughter
This sounds kind of corny, but the ability to make each other laugh and have genuine joy with your partner is huge. Having these moments together create a deeper relationship and it allows you to weather the inevitable storms of a long-term relationship.
Don't be closed minded
Having a routine with your partner is very Important and having a groove that you can fall into is equally important. However, that complacency can lead to a boring relationship that becomes stale and can foster resentment. A good way to fix this, according to Psychology Today, is to try new things. This sounds broad, because it is supposed to be, and it really can be almost anything new. Try going on a trip somewhere, or even try things in your own town that the both of you have never done before. When doing these new things, be open to any new experience you have with your partner. You may be able to see another side of your partner, which can help your partner see another dimension of your personality or of who you really are.
Don't hold back your love
Just saying "I love you" is not enough. You have to show you love your partner in more ways than one. There are big gestures you can do or small ones that really show you appreciate them. If you know your partner wants you to plan something for them, then you can easily plan a small trip or weekend getaway with your partner that sets off that spark.
Get your alone time
Do not lose yourself in your relationship. It is easy to morph into one person and the relationship evolves. Keeping your individuality which means that you have to let your personality and life take precedence and make sure you get time for yourself. Your time to yourself is precious and a lot of times rare. Having time to relax and center yourself will allow yourself to give your all to the relationship, and your partner will appreciate that.
Be open to communication
Feedback from your partner is very important. How can you know what you need to do to improve if you aren't openly talking to your partner? Share your needs and concerns and don't feel defensive if there is something your partner wants that you haven't given them yet, as there are always ways to improve. According to Psychology Today, use what you know about your partner and how they respond to your compassion and to have an open dialogue.
Show how much you appreciate your partner
Giving a lot to your partner is important, but when you partner does something great for you, its equally important to show them how much that means to you. If you want to keep your spark flickering, you need to show how invested you are in the things your partner does for you. Even if its not exactly your ideal gift, or ideal trip, the fact that someone went out of their way to give you something to make you feel good is something to be appreciated. Not only will it help you learn to be grateful, but it will smooth a relationship out when there could be trouble on the horizon.
Long term relationships are marathons, not sprints. In order to get that second wind, you need to put in the effort down the line to make it work. Long term relationships can be scary and take a lot of work to maintain. Good luck and happy dating!