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It's Okay Not to Get What You Want

There are times in life that can simply feel really hard and truly depleting. You don't understand why things happen they way they do. It can toss you into the most profound valleys of gloom. Maybe you cry out to a higher power to make things better. Perhaps you simply gaze into the universe and ask why circumstances became so difficult. Break-ups, career problems and financial issues can put you into this frame of mind. 

It's Okay Not to Get What You Want

When you don't get what you want, it's frustrating. Why can't things just be easier and simpler? Why can't things get better? Why can't we get what we want? In these times, we just need someone to bring some perspective to the situation.

It's okay not to get what you want

"Remember that sometimes not getting what you want is a wonderful stroke of luck." - Dalai Lama

When you don't get what you want, even if things ultimately work out for the better, it can be disappointing. However, there are some serious benefits to having life toss curveballs at you. Here are just a few of the many benefits of not getting precisely what you need:

  1. It allows you to realign your core interests: Everybody commits mistakes, but learning from them can radically change your life. Generally, when your plans don't happen as you need them to, you'll consider what turned out badly, what could have been done differently and what you can change about yourself to make sure you never end up in a similar situation. Giving yourself a reality check helps you to work smarter and aim higher than you had previously.

  2. You'll become more creative: When you really want something, you won't take no for an answer -- regardless of how frequently you hear it. Not getting what you want the first time leads you to think outside the box in order to get to your ultimate goal. It can make you fruitful and amazingly inventive.

  3. You'll learn new things: If things don't turn out as you trusted they would, you learn to create rules and values to help manage the future. You may undergo lessons or training to get better. You might develop a mantra to live by. When we settle ourselves, you tend not to make a mistake again. At the point when lined up with our instinct, a dimension of agony reemerges if we come close to repeat the same mistake.

  4. You'll find out who you are: It's easy to be positive, generous and fun when you're not worried, but who are you when you face the darkest possibilities is what makes you who you are. Finding our identity in these times gives us the opportunity to build on our strengths and work on our shortcomings.

  5. You'll learn to work smart: A roadblock can slow us down long enough to recognize the excess of energy we sometimes devote to working hard, but not working smart. The downtime you get from a "no" can help you re-strategize and re-approach a challenge with a new perspective.

  6. You'll learn to use negativity positively: Anger, frustration and fear are emotions that can be seriously toxic to your success, prosperity and relationships. But when you don't get what you want, you figure out how to utilize outrage to push you towards your goal. Disappointment and frustration can turn into vision, and fear can turn into courage. These are feelings that reflect the growth and can be used productively.

Push through hard moments where everything appears to be lost. When we do, we can find a new us on the other side that is wiser and more beautiful than we ever imagined. By working through these difficult changes in life, we grow into something better.

 

Contributor, May 29, 2019

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